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Working
with Students' Parents
- Resources
to assist advisors work with parents via Clearinghouse
- Overviews via NACADA publications dealing of the issues
surrounding advisors workings with parents
- Read More About
It! Resources for further study.
Advisors
and Parents: Together Building Stronger Advising Relationships
Mark
D. Menezes
Academic Advisor III
State College of Florida Manatee-Sarasota
Introduction
In
the early 1980's adult attitudes toward children started to shift.
According to Howe and Strauss (2000), the authors of Millennials
Rising: The Next Great Generation, the `80's became the era
of the protected and worthy child. Children became a planned part
of adult life. Planned parenthood, fertility clinics, test-tube
babies, and surrogate mothers all became popular. The children of
the Baby Boomers and Generation X, known as Millennials, became
the largest, healthiest, most wanted, and most cared-for child generation
in American history (Howe & Strauss, 2000). Millennials are
the children we saw securely buckled into child-safety seats and
shuttled in mini-vans and carpools to play sessions, soccer games,
and other structured activities with their parents leading the way.
Millennials
are now old enough to go to college, and the protective parents
that structured their lives as children are still holding the hands
of their now young adults as they make their way to colleges and
universities across the nation. Parents want to be a part of their
children's college experience. They want to monitor their progress
in classes, insure they are involved in activities, and, in so many
ways, be there for them to help solve any and all issues that may
arise. As a result, this generation feels secure, close to their
parents, and comfortable with authority (Howe & Strauss, 2000).
Today's
parents can seem intrusive and demanding. Their presence is changing
the relationship between academic advisors and the students they
advise. Advisors are now faced with finding a way to include parents
in the advising session without compromising a sense of trust and
confidence with students.
Generational
Distinctions
When
working with students, academic advisors may find it helpful to
understand the differences in social norms adopted by different
generations. The socially accepted values and conditions of those
raised in the `60s and 70s are very different from those raised
in the `80s and `90s. The Baby Boomers, those born between 1943
and 1960, are a generation raised by parents who read Dr. Spock.
Spock offered the first comprehensive philosophy to raising children
and offered advice to parents in a changing society (Verbeek, 1994).
The Baby Boomer generation was driven by new philosophies and government
change. They rebelled against authority and were driven in fighting
for what they believed was right for a better society. The Boomers
are a generation of sit-ins, marches on Congress, and free-love.
Generation
X, born between 1961 and 1981, is a generation that experienced
single parent households and being latchkey-kids. They witnessed
the beginning of the AIDS crises and the falling of the Berlin Wall.
Generation X grew up in a society that advocated individual freedoms
and looking out for #1.
Late
Boomers and early Xers are the parents of the new generation, self
dubbed, Millennials. The arrival of the Millennial generation was
announced by "Baby on Board" signs on minivans. They were
raised by protective parents obsessed with safety. They grew up
respecting authority and believing in a system that exists to help
make the world a better place (Howe & Strauss, 2000). This generation
accepts their parents as personal advocates, who are ready, willing,
and sometimes eager to challenge authority on behalf of their children.
According to a 1999 survey in Time , seventy-nine percent
of 12- to 14-year-olds polled said they looked up to their parents
more than any other adult role model (Howe & Strauss, 2000,
pg. 123). Today's generation admire their parents and care about
what they think.
Millennials
are also the first generation to be technologically savvy. They
grew up with the Internet, cell phones, and other new technologies.
When it comes to acquiring information, this generation is used
to easy access and instant gratification.
Impact
This Has on Academic Advising Today
Academic
advisors today are not just meeting with young students eager to
start their college career and plan their lives for the future;
they are also meeting with the parents and other family members
of this new college generation. Parents now expect to be an integral
part of their children's college experience. This significantly
changes the practice of academic advising and advisors need to outline
the expectations of students and parents. Because more and more
parents want to be included in the advising relationship, advisors
must adopt a new approach to advising that will still create an
environment for students to realize their autonomy and develop an
educational plan consistent with their personal goals. Good communication
is the key.
When
communicating with family members it's important that they understand
the Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act (FERPA). FERPA guarantees
students the right to privacy by limiting the accessibility to the
student's academic records to third parties, including the student's
parents. It's important for academic advisors to help parents understand
that they may be undermining the advisor's attempt to establish
trust with the student by asking the advisor to discuss the student's
academics or other issues without the student's permission. It's
ok for advisors to tell parents that they have met and know their
son or daughter. This can offer parents a sense of security knowing
their student is connected in some way with an official of the institution.
Other
things academic advisors can do to help parents understand that
the advisor and the institution have the best interest of their
student in mind is to offer as much information within the guidelines
of FERPA as possible. Important information advisors may consider
sharing with parents include the goals developed by the National
Academic Advising Association (NACADA) Task Force charged with providing
input to the Council for the Advancement of Standards (CAS), available
through the Clearinghouse of Academic Advising Resources (2005).
These goals include but are not limited to:
- Assisting students in evaluating
their personal values and beliefs.
- Assisting students in considering
their life goals by relating their interests, skills, abilities,
and values to careers, the world of work, and the nature and purpose
of higher education.
- Assisting students in developing
educational goals consistent with their life goals and objectives
and using these goals as a guide to decision making.
- Assisting students in developing
decision-making skills.
- Providing accurate information about
institutional policies, procedures, resources and programs.
This
type of information can help parents realize how advisors support
students in their learning and that advisors possess the expertise
needed to insure students get the most out of their time in college.
When communicating with parents, advisors can explain how college
provides a unique opportunity for parents and the institution to
partner together in helping students adjust to college life (MacKay
& Ingram, 2002). By encouraging communication between students
and their parents, parents can be allies to advisors and help strengthen
the advisor/advisee relationship.
Stack
(2003) offers more advice when communicating with parents:
- Provide parents (whether in person
or by mail) with some written information they can read later
about advising theory used at the institution.
- Be sympathetic but not apologetic:
if the student has run afoul of the college's rules and policies,
he or she needs to take responsibility.
- Stay cool and clearly outline the
student's options.
- Do not attempt to interpret or fix
family dynamics. However, continue to emphasize the student's
responsibility for his or her progress and encourage student-parent
communication about grades and progress.
Fairness
and Consistency in Advising
To
foster trust and respect from parents and students, consistency
in advising practices is vital. Baby Boomers and Xers are accustomed
to challenging authority and will do so on behalf of their children.
Parents will challenge inequities if they feel their child is getting
a "raw deal". It's important to treat students as individuals,
but advisors must be consistent in their approach to advising. Articulating
and following an advising theory with all advisees can help avoid
inequities and legitimize advising practices.
Defining
Roles
Some
parents see the academic advisor as a surrogate parent, i.e., in
loco parentis. Advisors should clarify their roles and extinguish
any myths about advising. Advisors should outline the roles of the
advisor, the student, and the parent at the first advising session.
These outlines may include, but are not limited to, the following
examples.
Academic
advisor role
- Monitor student progress and guide
the student toward academic success;
- Help the student understand his
or her responsibilities toward academic success;
- Act as a liaison between the institution
and the student;
- Act as an advocate for the student;
- Refer the student to appropriate
institutional resources.
In
many ways the academic advisor is a teacher and facilitator. Advisors
foster and encourage personal and intellectual growth in students
(Crookston, 1972); they do more than help students register for
classes. Academic advisors are well informed about the institution's
resources available to students. Academic advising is not a "one-stop
shop" but a wealth of knowledge that can help students navigate
the institutional system. In short, the academic advisor assists
students in the development of meaningful educational plans that
are compatible with personal and/or career goals and instill a desire
for lifelong learning.
Student
role
- Responsible for learning and understanding;
- Monitor his or her own academic
progress;
- Know the degree requirements of
the college and major of interest;
- Communicate with the advisor regarding
issues and/or concerns about academics or student life;
- Attend classes;
- Manage time for class preparation;
- Become familiar with university
resources;
- Understand and adhere to university
policies.
Student
responsibility is the key to all development and learning (Davis
& Murrell, 2003). In order to have a successful and meaningful
college experience, students must accept full responsibility for
their personal and academic progress. Academic advisors and parents
can act as role models to help students accept this responsibility.
Parent
role:
- Be available to support and encourage;
- Maintain regular contact;
- Offer advice (when appropriate);
- Encourage students to do things
they can do for themselves;
- Allow students to make mistakes
in this safe environment.
One
of the most important and valuable things parents can offer their
college students is support and encouragement. Because students
of today's millennial generation look up to their parents as mentors
and role models, positive reinforcement from parents is crucial
to college success. It is also important that advisors, students,
and parents support each other in helping students make responsible
decisions that will shape their future. Young college students are
in the process of realizing their autonomy. Helping parents understand
the importance of letting their children do things for themselves
can help students emerge as capable adults. If parents understand
the competencies and expertise of the academic advisor, they are
more likely to trust the judgment and wisdom of the advisor and
allow their children to experience and appreciate the new and exciting
challenges college life can bring.
References:
Council
for the Advancement of Standards in Higher Education (CAS). (2005).
Academic advising: CAS standards and guidelines . Linked from http://www.nacada.ksu.edu/Resources/Standards.htm#CAS
Crookston,
B. B. (1972). A developmental view of academic advising as teaching.
Journal of College Student Personnel , 13(1), 12-17.
Davis,
T. M. & Murrell, P. H. (2003). Turning teaching into learning:
the role of student
responsibility in collegiate experience. ERIC Higher Education
Digest . Retrieved
from http://www.ntlf.com/html/lib/bib/93-8dig.htm
.
Howe,
N. & Strauss, W. (2000). Millennials rising: The next great
generation. New
York , Vintage Books.
MacKay,
J. D. & Ingram, W. J. (2002). Let the journey begin: A parent's
monthly guide
to the college experience .
Boston, Houghton Mifflin Company.
Stack,
C. (2003). Talking with the parents of advisees. The Mentor
:
An Academic
Advising
Journal. Retrieved from http://www.psu.edu/dus/mentor/030714cs.htm.
Verbeek,
L. (1994). Dr. Spock's last interview. Parents' Press.
Cite
the above resource using APA style as:
Menezes,
M. D. (2005). Advisors and parents: Together building stronger advising
relationships. Retrieved
from the NACADA Clearinghouse of Academic Advising Resources
Web site: http://www.nacada.ksu.edu/Clearinghouse/AdvisingIssues/Advisors-Parents.htm
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